Learning the Things

I've been learning about REST when I'm thrust into busyness; WAITING on God's timing and purpose; DEEP BREATHS because oxygenation is good for you; LOTS OF PRAYING because I really don't have everything figured out; TRUST in knowing my Creator, who holds me in the palm of His hand, does have everything figured out; SIMPLICITY because the biggest lies are the ones I tell myself and breed ingratitude; THANKFULNESS in all things, in all times, especially the hard ones; ENCOURAGEMENT and how deeply out hearts need to give and receive it; PEACE when crippling loss is all around; and PATIENCE with myself and not jumping the gun when things don't come immediately that can only come in time. 

And here's a picture of a lake, because it reminds me of all those things. 

I can't believe I get to do this

Back in 2012, in the secluded practical nursing program corner at good ole Itasca Community College, 22 of us sat behind our desks and tried to follow our instructor's PowerPoints. Some days were easier than others. However, more than once, I'd zone out from the lecture as the reality of this whole situation hit me: I am in nursing school. I have the incredible opportunity to learn how to take care of people. Wow. I can't believe I get to learn this. I can't believe I'm here. I can't believe I get to do this. 

I was 16 when I was accepted into that practical nursing program. Between the moments of awe and surreal wonder, there were quite a few tears (or hysterical sobs), giggles, panic attacks, pep talks, and borderline mental breakdowns. I don't pretend to know the depths of my fellow classmates' lives or the hardships they've experienced, but I feel confident in saying that year was one of the hardest for all of us.The perpetual stress drove us forward and frazzled us at the same time.

And still, maybe it was God's grace for strength for one more day, while whispering into my head: I can't believe I get to do this.  

Fast-forward to age 21 and I'm still thinking the same thing. The setting has definitely changed more than once since that classroom at ICC. The wonder still hits even after the most chaotic of shifts--like my first night shift back after traveling to the States for 2 and a half weeks for a conference and a wedding. I'm not trained in Labor and Delivery or in the Emergency Room. I'm also still learning how to take care of the admitted patients. Wouldn't you know on that first 10-hour shift back with just 2 of us nurses: 9 admitted patients, 1 laboring mom, and 1 ER patient? By morning, we had 12 admitted patients. My excellent Honduran coworker had the misfortunes of working with not only someone who has only worked with one pediatric ICU patient since she's been at the hospital, but also lost her voice right before heading back to Honduras.

It could have easily been one of my worst shifts yet, but we chose to laugh instead. We were behind almost all night. In the rare moments that our paths would cross, we would laugh, say "Ya casi!" ("Almost there!") and then keep running to the next patient, the next medication, the next blood pressure. The shift eventually ended. As I walked home on the rickety bridge, it hit again: Wow. I can't believe I'm here. 

Some moments are no-brainers for those surreal feelings.
-When I sit on my hammock with a cup of coffee, listening to the howler monkeys, waking up after working a long night shift.
-When my roommate and I decide to go to the beach and end up taking 20 kids under the age 12--babies and all-- from the Children Center and their fabulous dorm parents. We splash and run away from the waves. We get buried in sand and drink all the water we brought.
-When I stand with the other missionaries as we sing in our hot little meeting room about how great our God is, how faithful He is, and how loving He is--after we had to re-intubate our patient for probably the third time.
-When my roommate agrees to walk all the way up to the water tower with me just catch the last glimpses of the sunset.

Water tower: Sunrise/sunset watching place of choice

For now, the next shift starts soon. The plethora of what I've been learning at the hospital would be overwhelming and extensive. So I'll leave a lighter list of non-medical things that I've had to learn.

-How to use a HAM radio
-How to use a French Press (my roommate received one as a housewarming gift, and very kindly lets me use it)
-How to enjoy cold showers
-How to light a non-automatic pilot gas stove and oven. (we just upgraded from matches to a long-handle lighter)
-How to get cobwebs out of toasters (still accepting suggestions on that one)

The real MVPs at Loma de Luz.
Eat those bugs, guys.

Favorite tree in bloom;
View from the back porch hammock

Thank you, WikiHow and multiple YouTube videos

Thank you for walking this journey with me! It's also so surreal to have people praying for me and partnering with me--thank you for being a part of all this!